To Overflowing

May 18, 2012

the hover-mother syndrome

I feel the “disease” plaguing me at times. The hover-mother syndrome. It’s when I hover over my kids just to make sure they follow all the “shoulds.” I hover so they don’t get too wild or too disobedient or too…well…out of my control.

God has patiently been working on me, slowly breaking my control-freakishness. Because it isn’t freedom for anyone — this hover syndrome.

So when I sense the thing flaring up, I purposefully try to remember a few key things He’s taught me.

Fields of Joy, Soustons, France
flickr photo credit

1. Train up, not control.

The Bible never says, “Fathers and mothers, control your children.” These kids aren’t mine to control. Really, nothing is mine to control. My calling is to train them up in the Lord.

Just like I said the other day, we set rules and teach God’s “law” but not because the laws will change their souls. Or even control them. God’s law is there to reveal our sin and desperation for a Savior. (Romans 7:7)

So I imperfectly teach them His ways throughout our day and then discipline (inconsistently at times) when they fail. But not because I think the laws will heal them. I have to trust Him to pierce and transform their hearts. He does the soul-work.

Train up, not control. (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)

Silentium
flickr photo credit

2. Take three steps back and stop talking.

Sometimes He speaks very literally with me. “Step back and close your sweet little mouth,” He says. Well, sometimes He’s more stern.

When I feel the need to hover I often have to physically step away and close my mouth, remembering point number one and then doing point number three. (Proverbs 13:3; Psalm 141:3)

32/52
flickr photo credit

3. Pray. It’s your fierce weapon in the battle for their souls.

True, I can’t control them. It isn’t my job as the parent. But I can stand in the gap. Because of Jesus’ blood over me, I can enter into the courts of my God and intercede for my kids.

But I don’t pray out of fear. At least not as often as I used to. I’m learning to pray with bold declaration of His promises. “You, Lord, love them more than I could ever love them. Work Your good will into their lives. Give them a love for Your statutes. I trust You.” (Matthew 6:7-13; Romans 8:38-39)

Fear not, for I am with you;
be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10

We can live free from that inner control-freak. Jesus died to set us free. But we need Him to open our eyes to when we grasp for the reigns of life. Then through His empowering we release people and situations to Him. We step back and close our mouths. And we pray fervently.

Fill me, Lord…

What or who do you find yourself hovering over in efforts to control?
How can we release those things and people to God?

1 Comment

Filed under daily filling, they call me mama

May 16, 2012

it’s what will change our world

This is one of those posts that burned in me. Like a fire that had to come out…or else some rocks in my front yard might have shouted. (Which would have been interesting.)

I think it started in me last week after my “Would Jesus vote” post. Maybe because I listened more closely to the political discussion, even among my fellow Christians. And it burdened me.

As the church we need one another. I need you and you need me. We need to hold each other accountable to true things.

those three words, #500 in explore, hahah
flickr photo credit

As believers, we’re convinced that God’s standard is the best standard. We believe that His ways — morally and spiritually — give us the supreme framework for societal living because He created…everything. And being that we live in a democracy, we get to express that standard through a vote.

But democracy is simply a shell. Political “victory” is only external. It doesn’t change hearts. It doesn’t produce love. It cannot be our place of hope.

It cannot be our place of hope.

It seems that some of us, even as Christ followers, hurl rude words at the world and take sin personally, thrilling at the thought of God’s judgment. But here’s the thing. Those who don’t know Jesus are just doing what they know to do. Apart from Him we live bound to self and sin. In fact those who don’t know Jesus are doing what they are supposed to do. Rebelling from their Maker.

But God is their Judge. Not me. (1 Corinthians 5:13)

My job as His child is to love. It’s how this world will know I am His disciple. I love my brothers and sisters. We hold each other accountable. We forgive continually. We give lavishly. We proclaim our Lord. And we pray fervently.

We pray for wisdom. We pray for His will. We pray for the souls around us, because if they haven’t truly accepted the sacrifice of Jesus then they will swallow God’s wrath for themselves. A sobering reality.

And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment, that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.
Philippians 1:9-11

Laws cannot transform this world. They only reveal our sin. A team of doctors cannot heal the rampant soul diseases. It’s love. When the love of God pierces to the division of soul and spirit, moms and dads and lawyers and store owners and, yes, even politicians change. And when people become vessels of God’s love, the world flips upside down with revival.

It’s what will truly change our world.

Fill me, Lord…

What do you think love looks like in our broken world?

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Filed under daily filling, navigating the gray

May 14, 2012

for when we fail…again {Memorizing the SOTM :: Week 17}

“You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”(Matthew 5:48)

Seriously?! You’ve got to be kidding me. Most days, I can barely make it passed breakfast without entertaining some unloving thought or speaking some harsh word in reaction to spilled…whatever. Unless I’m all alone, then I can be really Jesus-like.

Give me comatose joy like rerun T.V.
flickr photo credit

His words seem impossible. But that’s His point. He wants us to see our desperation. Righteousness does not come from us. We have heart issues. When left to ourselves, we hate rather than love our enemies.

Yet we live most satisfied when we walk in His ways. It’s how He designed us. Our soul awakens when we live in the freedom of “love-regardless.” But we can’t do it apart from Him.

That’s why our radical God poured out His grace and mercy on that tree. He forgives and cleanses all our imperfections through the blood of Jesus. Our call is to believe that His grace covers it all.

But even after we believe, we still wrestle against the selfishness within. We still make mistakes and overreact to life. Like yesterday. Remember…it was Mother’s Day.

I woke up early to spend time with God then wrote a blog post about how God is our refuge through the constancy of motherhood. And would you believe that within about eighteen minutes of clicking “publish” I overreacted to the high levels of whining and had to run to my Refuge-God, believing His grace to be enough.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins
and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9

We won’t be perfect. We will make mistakes possibly within minutes of closing our Bibles. But our God is grace. And we’re desperate for Him. For the sake of our soul-peace, we have to believe that when we confess the daily evidences of our imperfection, our God faithfully cleanses from all unrighteousness. All of it. Gone.

We can’t be perfect, that’s why we need a Savior.

For those joining me in memorizing Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount,
here are this week’s verses. Keep rehearsing it, friends:
“Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.”
Matthew 6:1-2

Fill me, Lord…

Do you wrestle against guilt over your mistakes?
How do we rest in the grace and merciful forgiveness of our God?