the good, the bad, and the ugly {desperate for grace}

February 15, 2013 By 13 Comments

I’ve known the call on my life for about eleven years: declare on the rooftops what He speaks in the closet. God told me that after He redeemed me from some deep mess back in 1999. Ever since, I’ve been compelled to be real and raw about my own faith, love-walk with Jesus — the good, the bad, and the ugly.

When He led me to start blogging a few years ago, I knew that it was an extension of that call. That this would be a platform He would graciously use for me to spill out all He teaches in my own little life — trusting that He would take these human words and by His grace anoint them to touch a heart or two.

I’m not one for putting on some “religious show” — we’ve seen enough of that. I’m not into fake religiosity — which is good because neither was Jesus. I truly want to be an authentic (though highly imperfect) reflection of my Lord, which is partly why I needed to take that blogging break.

 

Enough, my child.

 

One of the things I often say is “if what I say (and write and tweet) doesn’t first transform the moments of my own life then I’m missing the point.” And the truth is, for a few weeks I headed down a very selfish road, hurting some people He’s commissioned me to love. But God.

But. God. He stopped me. To be honest, He sold me out. He said, “Enough, daughter. That’s enough.” And then He peeled me off the ground. It hasn’t been easy. In fact it’s been downright excruciating to see some of the unsettled places of my heart. But He allowed all of it for a thousand different reasons. And for that, I’m thankful.

Where does that leave me today? A little scarred. A little bruised and heart-sore. A lot humbled. But passionately reveling in the great grace of our merciful Lord. And desperate that He alone gets the glory. I’m absolutely nothing without Him.

So it’s good to be back. And don’t go too far. By His grace, I’ve got lots to say.

 
Fill me, Lord…

Tell me about a time when His grace totally overwhelmed you.
 

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Filed Under: daily filling, keeping it real
  • Kara osborne

    I’m so glad that you are back!!! I’ve missed your words and your encouragement. You are such a blessing in my life, even though we have never met. God has had to stop me and correct me many times…many!! I blogged about one of them a while back and even when I read it now, I still cringe at the huge blind spots I had been operating from. You can read it here if you’re interested http://marcusandkara.blogspot.com/2011/05/anyway.html . Thanks for your faithfulness, Lara. I appreciate you so much!

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      We are all so needy for grace. So needy. Bless you, sister.

  • Jennifer Surprenant

    Love you

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      :)

  • Margie

    I am so glad you have returned. You words always seem to be timely and I joyously pass them on. As I come to work and open I my email I hoping you are there to help me start my day here. I use you pictures as wallpaper so when I am not in my office you are there for me to see upon my return to help put aside the selfish sometime nasty thoughts about my co-workers whom I struggle with their way of work ethics.

    I thank you again that your words can help me keep the wrong words in my mouth.

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      We’re all in process. Me. You. Those coworkers. All of us — so needy for Jesus. Praying His Spirit stirs in you today, friend, empowering you to be light even in a dark place. Much love!

  • HisFireFly

    ” declare on the rooftops what He speaks in the closet”
    I know that call, it beats in my blood, burns in my spirit, will not allow me to remain silent

    love this, love you

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      “Will not allow me to be quiet.” I totally get that. Totally. Praying many blessings over you as you walk out that call, my friend.

  • StefanieYoungBrown

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for ALWAYS being crystal clear, choosing to live transparently in an often cloudy place. He continues to use your words ~ spoken, written, or rapped ~ to penetrate and inspire my heart.

  • Julie C

    Amazing how closed doors filled in with grace turn into the most beautiful things! Two years ago God closed a door that broke me. He used your book to show me how to fill up with his word. His word is the daily grace that overwhelms me. Still have no idea where he is leading, where this path is going – to radical change or simply faith in plodding out the same course. Your words are so often the light I need. I am thankful for the light you shine. I love your words. And you.

  • Beth Jennings

    Scars are usually where you find the most beauty.

  • Amy Miller

    I am so thankful to see you blogging again. You are so real and such an inspiration to me. God has overwhelmed me so lately to stop concentrating on “Everything” and to relax, to breath and to allow him to concentrate for me.

  • laurenwlutz

    I was baptized and confirmed in a church when I was 10, and that event held a tremendous amount of spiritual significance/emotional attachment for me. When I married my husband, I was kind of marrying into a denomination, too, seeing that he was ordained as a pastor a few months after we got married. The church we came to serve in (where he was youth pastor at the time) required baptism by immersion for membership – which I had not had. I fought it. I’d already had a believer’s baptism, and you know – the principle of the thing!

    Then the Lord convicted me that it was time. Time to unite with this family. The theology of the whole thing is not what’s so important to me now. Just that He was leading.

    My husband stood in the baptistry, and I sat on the edge behind the archway window, waiting for him to share with the congregation my story.

    In that moment, I sort of had a outside-of-time moment in which He showed me how far I had – or hadn’t – come in more than a decade of sanctifying life. So with my eyes a little wider, I breathed in two lungs full of grace. And it felt really good.