I used to pray things like “CHANGE HIM (or her), Lord! Please! Or I may lose my mind!” But the more I spent time with God gleaning from His Word, the more He changed my heart and my desires. And the more He changed my desires to line up with His desires, the more my prayers transformed.

Instead of praying out of fear or selfishness, I started praying more in line with His will. I started to say things like, “God glorify Yourself through me. If this situation or person never changes, change me and use me to reflect Your love.” Or, “Be glorified in this relationship, in Your time and Your way. I trust You, Lord, with the details of working that out.” And you know what? He always answers those kinds of prayers with a “yes.”

God does promise to give His followers what they ask for. But typically those promises have conditions attached. “Delight yourself in The Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4) The condition? Delight in Him. “If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” (John 15:7) The condition? Abide.

When we seek Him first and foremost — delighting in Him and abiding in His Word — our desires transform. And when our desires transform, our prayers transform. And when we pray according to His will, His response is always “yes!” In His time and in His way, “yes.”

Today the book club is talking about chapter 9 of To Walk or Stay, the chapter on prayer. Click here to head over to Erika Dawson’s blog to read and/or join in on the discussion.

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The flesh will fight it because we want physical proof and instant gratification. But if we’re going to follow Jesus, then there’s a little word we can’t escape: faith.

In spite of what we may see, in spite of what we may feel, in spite of what we may want, our soul finds rest when we walk by faith. And our faith can grow most fierce when we can barely see what’s coming next.

Faith comes with a cost. It grows in the valleys. It blooms most vibrant where the ground seems completely desolate. I don’t know why He designed it that way, but He did. It’s through the darkest seasons of life that our faith can become fierce.
p. 111, To Walk or Stay

It’s book club day and this week we’re talking about chapter 8 of To Walk or Stay. It’s the chapter on “Waiting in Belief.” Because inevitably there’s going to be a space of time between God’s spoken promise and it’s fulfillment. The question is what we do while we wait.

The sweet Joyce Moy is hosting our discussion over at her blog. Click here to read what others are saying or to join the conversation.

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I couldn’t believe what happened to me at Walmart yesterday! Watch the video below for the story.

If you’re reading via email, click here to watch the video.

OK, I know the example was a little superficial. And no, I honestly didn’t see the person who did it (I was really engrossed in price comparison and decision making). And yes, I really was only about 10, maybe 15, steps down the aisle away from my cart. The nerve. And thankfully my purse was on my shoulder. Note to self: don’t leave valuables unattended.

But regardless, bitterness from unforgiveness steals life from us. That’s one reason God instructs us to forgive. He loves us and wants us free. Plus, when we truly recognize how much grace we’re under, forgiveness is the only logical choice.

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Colossians 3:12-13

This day can be a step in the direction of true healing — even from the most devastating of wounds. Let’s dare to take our thoughts captive to forgiveness, releasing judgment to God.

The To Walk or Stay book club is discussing chapter 7 of my book today over at (the gracious and admired!) Francie Winslow’s blog “Up, In, and Out.” Click here to come over and read or join in on the discussion.

 
Fill me, Lord…

How have you seen bitterness and unforgiveness steal from you?
How have you seen forgiveness bring soul freedom?
 

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I wrote a disclaimer at the beginning of the chapter because I wanted to be very clear that in Christ there is no condemnation. If you have been through a divorce, you have not committed the unpardonable sin. Our God heals and restores. So the purpose of the chapter isn’t condemnation.

I wrote the chapter out of a place of wanting to understand God’s “heart” on the issue. I specifically wanted to know why He says He hates it. Because to be honest, divorce seemed like a really great option for my marriage.

Like God does, He spoke. And He showed me through His Word His intended design of marriage — His created purpose — and how divorce wasn’t part of that plan.

He designed marriage to be an evangelistic picture to the world, displaying the relationship between Christ and the church. Divorce doesn’t fit in that image. That’s why it’s so painful. He intended for it to be a one-flesh covenant unto death.

He hates divorce because it doesn’t reflect Him. Because He (thankfully!) never leaves or forsakes.

Tracie Stier-Johnson is hosting our discussion this week at her blog. And I have to tell you, I love this girl. She has walked through (and continues to walk through) a very difficult marriage journey. But she has hope and peace that never ceases to amaze me.

Listen to her heart…

(If you are having trouble viewing, click here to see Tracie Stier-Johnson’s response to Chapter 6 of “To Walk or Stay”)

Wow. Isn’t her testimony amazing? We serve a very big God who does wildly miraculous things in response to our faith.

Click here to come over to Tracie’s blog and join the discussion of chapter 6.

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Today we’re discussing chapter 5 of my new book “To Walk or Stay.” The lovely Michele Lyn is hosting our discussion over at her beautiful blog. Click here to come on over. I would love to hear your thoughts!

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For those reading this post via email,
click here to watch “To Walk or Stay” :: Chapter 4.

Did you hear it? Why does clamoring to be called beautiful by our world leave us restless?

Talk about a change in perspective. Getting a right view on true beauty gave me more confidence than any cute haircut or better tan or plastic fix ever could.

Ok now I want to hear your thoughts on chapter 4. Click here to head over to Kayse’s blog. She’s graciously hosting our discussion this week.

And if you haven’t gotten the book yet but want to, you can click here to purchase it through Amazon.

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I’ll get us started with this really short, 2-minute thought. (And of course, considering this chapter’s topic, I do highlight Janet Jackson and her infamous song “Control.”)

Click here to watch “To Walk Or Stay :: Chapter 2″

The sweet Crystal Stine is hosting this week’s discussion over at her blog. Click here to be painlessly transferred to her post where we can read her thoughts — I LOVE what she had to say! — and then share our own. See you over there!

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“The ultimate point of this book is to show you how I wrestled before my God in the midst of a devastating valley and to testify to His faithful guidance.” This book is a testimony, not a prescription.

I’m sure that there are difficult, messy, multi-faceted situations that some of you currently face. I’m not claiming to have all the answers. If anything I’m praying that this book would simply spur us to seek our God.

It’s so easy to follow after feelings, especially when they are raw and painful and vengeful. But often our emotions cloud good judgment. And we need time to process before the One who sees the beginning from the end. He promises to guide His children.

So this book isn’t a prescription. It’s a dare. “A dare to take God at His Word and a dare to allow His promises to affect the choices you make today.”

Now let’s discuss Chapter 1

I would love if each of you could answer the questions in a comment below. But I think it would also be great if you could respond to at least one other person’s comment. Let’s get discussion going. Let’s make this interactive with one another. Let’s pray for our sisters that are walking this book journey with us.

1. If you could take away one thing from this chapter and bury it deep in your heart, what would it be?
2. How can you choose to bind to the Lord in the day-to-day, regardless of your feelings?
3. In the digging deeper section we looked at Jeremiah 17. The last question asked, “How would you describe your own heart these days?” How did you respond?

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