being the church or just playing church {who am I}

August 3, 2012 By 17 Comments

Our new neighbors invited my kids to their VBS this week. I had never heard of their church. So I must admit that I drove there with slight hesitation on Tuesday evening.

Not hesitation because our new neighbors aren’t nice. They’re great! But I had never stepped foot into a Native American church. And sadly, stereotypes kept coming to mind until I imagined people in headdress chanting over baskets of snakes. Ugh. How horrible!

When I got there my neighbor invited me to stay, insisting that it wasn’t just for kids. So I followed them inside their little church inwardly rehearsing my snake holding skills just in case…having no idea how amazing the next couple of hours would be.

It wasn’t the technology. They really didn’t have any. It wasn’t the band. We sang to music from a CD. It was the people and Jesus. It felt fresh. And real.

 

Fresh feet
flickr photo credit

 

Aside from the sweet time of Bible study in a tiny room with fourteen other adults and Hawaiian Punch, one statement blessed me more than anything else.

During our adult worship time — which consisted of us creating a dance to our class VBS song (don’t laugh) — a lady said, “I tried to make up some moves to that song this week but since I’m a smoker, I could barely breathe!” She didn’t try to hide her smoking or act like something she wasn’t. She’s a smoker. It was honest. And it really blessed me.

 

For the record, I don’t think smoking is evil. I just think it does unkind things to our body — spoken from killing my own lungs while I was in college. And I think it’s one thing some Christians try to hide.

 

It’s so tempting to hide behind these masks of who we think we should be or who we want to be or who we think others want us to be. But let me tell you from experience, that mindset will drain the life out of us.

Imagine the intimacy that could develop in the Body of Christ if we just laid our struggles out there. If we stopped hiding and simply said, “You know what, I’m a smoker.” “I can’t stop drinking.” “I’m addicted to pornography.” “I’m nasty to my kids.” “I’m drowning in debt because I love stuff.” “I lie, cheat, steal, or gossip.”

What would happen if we were just honest. Because sin is just evidence that we’re human. Addictions just reveal what everyone else already knows about us: We ain’t God.

Maybe some would point fingers and talk behind our backs. That’s what the flesh does. But maybe some would just say, “Alright sister, you want freedom from that thing? I’ll pray for you and walk with you through this. Nothing is impossible to overcome with God.”

 

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
James 5:16

 

When the church acts like the church instead of simply playing church, unbelievable revival fires set ablaze. When we’re real before our neighbors, when our sin is exposed to God’s healing love and radical forgiveness, we transform. And when we transform, homes transform, churches transform, and nations transform.

It’s why Jesus died.

 
Fill me, Lord…

I would love to hear of a time when you experienced the church being the church.

 

I won’t blog next week because I have a writing deadline that’s pressing down. (My first big girl book is getting closer and closer to completion. Woo to the hoo!)

Between raising three kids, trying to be a good wife to my man, keeping the major messes contained, feeding all these people in love, and doing the final edits on the manuscript, I have to set something down. The blog it is.

So I’ll see you on August 13th! Lord willing.

 

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Filed Under: daily filling, keeping it real
  • Karan

    I am in such a sweet body of believers that its truly hard to pick just one time. But if I had to it would be the time something tragic happened in my life, and my husband called my dear friend who to come over. When she arrived, I told her “I cannot take church answers right now. I cannot take scripture right now. I do not want to know that this will work out. I am broken, this is bad, and I want you to just agree with with me that this is awful.” She saw that, cried with me, loved on me, held me, and agreed with me that what was happening was indeed awful. And hours after I truly had regained my sanity, by the prompting of the Holy Spirit himself, she spoke some very healing words. But not until my spirit was ready. She allowed me freedom in my grief. We believers are so often so busy to defend God’s sovreignty that we forget to stand beside and just weep at the awfulness in someone’s life. God does not need me to defend Him, he needs me to love on those around me – free from judgment. It was truly most beautiful and it truly soothed my Spirit. And just in case someone who is “in ministry” feels they cannot share because of their “position,” let me also state now that I am a preacher’s wife. The lady who came over is also a member of our church. But more important, we are family. And I needed help, and I am not afraid for people to see me as “needy,” for that is what I am. Just needed to throw that in there in case someone reads this and thinks “I can’t be real.” Yes you can, its a choice. May God help us all to get real, stay real, and not be afraid of real. Jesus embraced every bit of “real” and only rejected “illusions.” (religious crowd).
    Living in His acceptance,
    Karan

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Just beautiful, Karan. Thank you so much for sharing.

  • Kelly Swanson

    Oh, Lara, what a sweet sweet message. You have stumbled on my “secret weapon” as a motivational speaker – honesty and truth – taking off the face. Most people in my audiences don’t feel perfect (or anywhere close) and can’t connect to someone they feel is “beyond” them or just doing a better job at life than them. But when someone comes in front of them – broken – admitting where they fail – holding their flaws up for all the world to see – then it feels them with encouragement. My mistakes forgive their mistakes. My courage to admit I get it wrong more than I get it right, gives them courage to “get real.” And when people “get real” God starts working in MIGHTY ways. I see it happen too many times to count. For God does His best work with the broken. Thank you for showing us your brokenness – for it is then that we truly see what God can do.

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Yes! When we are real God works Mightily! You have a powerful message, my friend. Praying that He enlarges your influence for His great glory.

  • http://thepoorganiclife.com/ Katrina

    A-MEN! I have been trying to encourage true transparency and exhibit it, but it is so tricky in a culture that seems to see confession as a way to plead for sympathy or commiseration. Also, our generation of women uses self deprication for humor. So, where in all that is the genuine authenticity that come from seeing our need for Jesus, owning our mess, but also moving past it? Instead of saying to my girlfriends, “Oh yeah, I do that too.” and giving her a little smile and a pat on the arm, I want to say, “Let’s pray RIGHT NOW to be freed from this.” I’ll be praying LOTS of efficiency and productiveness for your writing this week.

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Oh girl, you really touched on something so of which to be so cautious. We want to be open and real…as He leads. I think it is vital that we first go to our God with all our mess. Then allow Him to mend through the power of His Spirit and the support of those with whom He leads us to share our personal lives. Bless you in your ministry, friend.

  • Leslie

    I just love this.

  • http://bohemianbowmans.com/ Jessica

    I was once apart of a small church like this. It still had it’s problems of course. But we knew we would like the people when a very nervous, former alcoholic stood up to share what was on his heart one Sunday night and he took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and threw them down the center aisle and told someone to take them from him. :)

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Wow. The power of the gospel. Love that, Jessica. (And you touched on something that’s so important to remember; no church filled with human people will ever be perfect.) Praying His blessings on your blog and writing!

  • http://joyouslyredeemed.blogspot.com/ Sara H

    It wasn’t too long ago that I wouldn’t have understood this at all. For years we were part of a church that basically believed the only business of the church was to preach. If you had any problems you went to professionals and, even when things were really, really horrible, and things got really, really horrible for us, the pastor simply didn’t have time to be bothered. He was busy preparing the sermon for Sunday. Needless to say we left it, but we were barely intact. God was so incredibly gracious and led almost immediately to a church where the pastor believes, teaches, and lives “real.” The funny thing is, now that I know I can be real, most of the things that used to be such struggles for me are not. It’s as if knowing that I can be honest with people about my problems makes the burden of them so much less. I still have issues, but they don’t weigh me down as much anymore. I have learned in less than the year that we’ve been there that when the church is the church it frees people to do the work Christ has called them to, without the fetters of trying to be perfect for the sake of everyone else. :) Praying for your work this week.

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Thanks for even being real here, Sara. Freedom comes with authenticity. I’m encouraged to hear you found a group of believers that embraces honest living and loving! Bless you, friend.

  • http://www.tanyamarlow.com/ Tanya Marlow

    Love this post. I am privileged to be part of a church where they ARE church. I know this because for the past 2 years I have been too ill to go to church – I have only made it to two services in the last 20 months. But we have a community of believers who email me, pray for me, who have ironed our clothes, cooked us meals, sent us flowers – not just once, but repeatedly over the two years. This is church: meeting people at their point of need – unglamorous, but oh so precious.

    Thank you for this post – was such a good reminder of the value of my church,

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      That’s beautiful, Tanya. Really. That’s the point. Fellow brothers and sisters helping to carry the burden. Love.

  • Elisabeth

    YES! I’ve experienced this at times over the years. One thing I really appreciate about our home church is that the pastor is as transparent as he can be–without glorifying sin, if you know what I mean. The most amazing experience I’ve had of this, however, was sadly not in “real” church, but as part of a Celebrate Recovery group within a church. The people I met through that small group have been my truest friends, and we all wish THAT’s what church was ALL about–being real and moving on with Jesus! (Not just shaking hands on Sundays and spouting, “Bless you”s and “Peace be with you”s while we’re aching inside…)

    • Sarah

      I attend Celebrate Recovery at my church as well. As soon as I read Lara’s post my mind went instantly to CR and how accepted I feel to remove the mask and share my sin. Praying for more churches to reach out and be healing churches who help people to speak honestly about their sin. The only way to be freed from it is to first move out of the denial of it. Blessings!

  • Tracee

    This is the precise reason I quit going to church ten years ago. Everyone was so fake and when caught in a “sin”, repented. Over and over and over again. I still cannot understand how people can be so righteous and just keep sinning over and over and over again. It’s obviously a problem, so fix it. The pastor of the church was the most guilty, followed by the “elders.” At the time, we had a newly adopted daughter who was exhibiting separation anxiety and a fear of crowds and loud noise…so that was our real excuse.

    While we were waiting to adopt our daughter, I took a job in a local Methodist church and came to the realization that “church” is just a business. Behind the scenes is ugly and I could not believe how unchristian these people were! I was the victim of sexual harassment and when I made it known, other women in the office spoke up that the associate pastor had done the same to them. I left the job. I didn’t really need to work…just wanted something to pass the time while we waited on our referral from China and to support my spending habit on clothes for our baby girl.

    Long story short. I refuse to attend the church we left and my husband refuses to attend anywhere else. Our daughter is now 10 and has never set foot in a church. We are good and moral people. We make mistakes and we admit them and we fix where we screw up.

    Tracee

    • http://www.larawilliams.org Lara Gibson Williams

      Tracee, thank you for commenting. First, I am so sorry for your experience with the “church.” Sadly too many churches today would be unrecognizable to the early church of the book o Acts. In fact, the situations you describe are exactly what Paul addressed in the letter to the church at Corinth. (see 1 Corinthians) It dishonors our Lord when we judge and point and hurt one another. So again, I am so sorry for your experience.

      I would encourage you to guard your heart from bitterness. I am not implying that you are bitter, but if that would have happened to me I would be tempted to be bitter. The enemy loves bitterness because it steals joy and peace from us. So be on guard and dare to forgive.

      I would also encourage you to pray together with your husband about finding other believers to walk this crazy life with. We as believers need one another to spur us on in the faith. Going to an actual church isn’t important, but keeping fellowship with other believers is vital.

      Bless you, sister. You are precious and loved by our great God.