I used to squirm when someone gave me a compliment. I guess I wrestled against a strange mix of pride and insecurity — I still can if I’m not on guard. But God has patiently taught me something in recent years. And I can sum it up as, “Get over yourself. It’s not about you.” That’s the blunt version in my own words.
Any good I give, anything admirable in me, any righteous ways seen through my hands or words, have Him as the Source. Not me. I’m utterly depraved when left to myself. But He. He is love and beauty and perfection.
flickr photo credit: domenico salvagnin
Whether others see the natural abilities in me or the grace gifts of His Spirit, they all come from Him. Every good thing comes from Him.
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.
(James 1:17-18)
A while back I heard an analogy that really put things into perspective. (Forgive me for not knowing who said this. It may have been Corrie ten Boom.)
She said that she imagined compliments as flowers. When someone gave her a “flower,” she accepted it with a gracious, “Thank you” and a smile. Then when she found herself alone, she took that “flower,” looked up at her Father, and handed it to Him with a gracious and humble, “Thank you.”
He gifts. He graciously bestows. If our minds stay fixed on the Source of our gifts and abilities, then pride has no place. (Proverbs 16:18-19)
My friend, He gifted you — first with His all-powerful, indwelling Spirit and then with grace-gifts meant to be nurtured and used.
He gifts us for our own good. He gifts us for the good of others. And He gifts of for His deserved glory.
When others speak praise for the gifts flowing from us, we can give a humble “thank you” and then hand that praise to Him, the Source of all good things. He alone deserves the glory.
Fill me, Lord…
How have you struggled with accepting compliments for your gifts?
How do you personally handle “praise” without falling into pride?
Beautifully spoken. I, too, used to find it very difficult to accept compliments from others. When I started loving and accepting myself more, it became easier. I really like the scripture you use here from James…a perfect lens to view this through. 🙂
Hi Hope! I pray you are doing well these day. I like that passage in James too. GIves perspective. Blessings!
Lara…I often refute a compliment…I recently have been blessed to start a friendship with an amazing godly woman who asked “to sit at my feet”. I refused such a thing for some time as she is nearly 10 years older. Once I denied my insecurity to have anything to offer a elder, hence wiser minimally by default, I found God wanted to teach me. I know surprise surprise. One of the many things this friend has taught me is how to accept a compliment. Often she will encourage me or overhear another in the homeschool community do so and I begin to refute it…she nudges me and mildly reminds me “you say thank you Jolene”. And I smile and do so. Unto completion Lara…He is gracious to keep working on. Thank girl- love you.
Unto completion. (I love that.) And I just know that you are a beautiful reflection to this woman. She sees Jesus in you. 🙂
I love this post Lara. I have also struggled with compliments and praise from my audiences – until God showed me that it wasn’t me on that stage – that it was Him working through me -that I had somehow become His hands and feet – and that the awe/wonder/love/praise showered on me, were supposed to be for Him. I am often reminded that God used ordinary people in the Bible – so that they would know it was God. And you can’t get more ordinary than me. So when the compliments come, I make sure the giver knows that what they saw was not me – that what they felt was not from me – that what they experienced was not created by me – but by the awesome wonderful Father who used me to reach them – and gave me the honor of a front row seat. So instead of walking away saying, “Wow, Kelly is so good.” They say, “Wow, God is so good.”
Thank you, God, for all the many ways you reached out through my friend Lara – and for all the times you have graced us through her hands, feet, mouth, and pen. May you always have the glory.
Your wacky awestruck motivational speaker with eyes fixed on you,
Kelly
And oh how He shines through you, Kelly. Thanks for taking the time to comment. I know life is crazy-busy for you these days. Much love, friend.
This post resonates greatly with me. Like you shared, I struggle with receiving compliments. The ticker tape that scrolls through my mind is “no, I’m not worthy of a compliment or your praise”. This statement grabbed me:
When others speak praise for the gifts flowing from us, we can give a humble “thank you” and then hand that praise to Him, the Source of all good things. He alone deserves the glory.
Oh, thank you for being sensitive to the Holy Spirit and sharing your heart. This post has blessed me greatly!
Love to you, sweet sister-friend…
Hi Stefanie! We haven’t chatted through cyber world in a while but I do pray you are encouraged these days. Thanks for those kind words. Be blessed, sister.
I know and I’ve missed chatting! I’m very excited for Run To Him! I know I’m in for a blessing and a “treat”.
Have a wonderful day, sweet sister-friend…
I enjoy your blog so very much!! It’s like you have a listening bug in all the corners of my house and mind. As a result of your series “He Gifted You” I am wondering if you know of a book on prayer. Any help would be appreciated:)) PS Happy New Year
God’s word and your flower analogy have helped me overcome something I have struggled with for 14 years – receiving and accepting compliments while remaining humble. Thank you.